High Stakes for Problem Gamblers

Jul 23, 2018

Source: ABC Queensland, “Mick, Sarah, and Ian – The Stakes are High for Problem Gamblers.” Feb. 21,2008

It can start so innocently. So you had a little bet on the Melbourne Cup and lost, or you overspent a little on the pokies. You tell yourself, “So what, I won’t do it next time”. But the fact is that for some people what starts out as a harmless dabble in gambling can grow into an obsession.

Mick, Sarah and Ian know what it’s like to lose control. They’re all reached the point when gambling began to ruin their lives. They know what it’s like to lose everything, their family and friends, money and possessions, dignity and self-esteem.

But in the hope they may be able to help others, they want to encourage others to take the road to recovery.

Ian says an addiction to gambling is like an allergy. “For people who may be allergic to bees, they won’t go sitting near a bee hive but for me, I’m allergic to gambling but that’s the thing I want to get to, as often as I can”.

Sarah agrees, “It’s very much like an allergy that you can’t get away from. It’s caught you”.

Like other addictions, problem gambling has at its initial high, in this case, the thrill of winning. When it’s working, it feels good; you’re making money, living in the moment and everything in the universe is working with you, picking you up and carrying you along.

Mick describes those moments as the biggest thrill he’s had in his life. “I used to say the more money I had in my pocket, the bigger the superman symbol on my chest… the greater I’d feel. It was an incredible high”.

“It’s like you’re in love”, Sarah laments, “and you’re sedated with this enormous feeling. Everything is possible”.

But most gamblers will tell you at some point it all comes crashing down. These stories are no exception. During their recovery, all three have had time to reflect on their addictions with gambling.

“It’s a false hope that it’s going to turn the corner very shortly. With me it was poker machines. I live in a hope that it’s going to turn soon and then I’ll leave. But I never leave because I am a compulsive gambler,” says Sarah.

“I’ve come to believe that gambling isn’t the problem, I’m the problem,” adds Mick.

Ian says he was born a compulsive gambler. “I was just waiting to have that betting experience and once I had that experience there was a sensation inside me that I wanted to keep finding in my life. At one stage I had my own small business and I was working two other jobs on the side. The problem was, the more I earned the more I spent”.

He reached a personal low when he managed to gamble the cost of a car in a single weekend. “I convinced the bank that I was going to come to Brisbane over the weekend and purchase a second hand car – that was the reason for the loan. And I got that cash, and I proceeded to lose that in the next 36 hours through the poker machines. It was over ten thousand dollars”.

In comparison, Sarah feels her early life, in a big family in the Solomon Islands, pre-disposed her to become a gambler. “Gambling and drinking is a normal thing in our family. When I grew up I didn’t really want to be a gambler because I saw what it causes. I got a scholarship to Australia when I was fifteen and I stayed on and I thought ‘Thank God I got away from that’. But deep within me I had already engraved those belief systems with me”.

Her life reached a low point when her husband left her with a large debt and a young daughter. Seriously depressed and unable to reach out for help, she was considering suicide the day a girlfriend first introduced her to the pokies at an RSL club.

“My friend gave me five dollars and said ‘Try this’. So when I tried it, I won the mini-jackpot. All that feeling of depression just lifted. Wow, what a feeling. My heart came alive. And so from there, I went on… gambling with the friends once a week. I started going by myself, I started going every night, after work… for six and a half years. I hocked all my things. Then at the end I was living in a garage, with my child. I looked forward to seeing the poker machine and I’d treat it like a lover”.

In the end, it was something Sarah’s daughter said to her that made her act. Sarah says she could see her daughter’s pain and fear mirroring her own childhood and she called the Gamblers Anonymous helpline.

On the other hand, Mick’s gambling story began when he was an immigrant schoolboy, unable to speak English, who found success in the playground through his marble-playing prowess. “As I progressed in life I learnt how to gamble on all sorts of things: pinball machines; playing darts; pool tables; scratchies; lottos; casino games; the whole lot… I just loved gambling – full stop”.

Before he was even 21, Mick knew he was in deep trouble with gambling. It wasn’t long after, when he gambled the savings he and his fiancée had accrued for their engagement party, that his mother and fiancée gave him an ultimatum.

His first attempt at quitting was unsuccessful and he went on to plummet to lower depths, including serving three jail terms for gambling-associated crime. “I’ve slept in the park across from the casino. I stole from friends, family and neighbors. I broke into people’s homes. I broke into businesses. I ended up in hospital for with severe stomach pains through absolute fear because I owed money to people on the wrong side of the law”.

Mick ended up at the Salvation Army Rehabilitation Centre at Red Hill. “What I had was time out. I had time to work out who I am, what I am and what I need to do to recover from this problem. And so for thirteen months I had this wonderful time out.

“Some of the keys for us to recover are first of all we’ve got to become honest – to ourselves and to other people. For me personally, it’s a relief. It’s a lot easier to be honest than to be dishonest”.

Sarah finishes his sentence and reflects on the similar place the three have been and where they all don’t want to return. “It’s a sentence with a full stop and that’s it, it’s completed”.